Recently on my mind.

What if ; when I wake up next morning , I suddenly realize the sun rise from west ?

PIEce of Mind ( REad and HEed )

Greetings.

Its been awhile. Again, This Ayie come again to talk rubbish. Cheewah.

           Macam selalu lah. Datang ke blog hanya bila terasa tekanan hidup supressed me hard to ground. Otak rasa macam timed bomb. Awaiting to explode gitu.Haha

           Honestly , I've been thinking entah berapa kali untuk ranting bla bla and bla di sini tapi masa tidak mengizinkan. Lebih kurang macam begitulah ayatnya.

          This ayie terasa hendak cakap random things. A lot. Kinda of don't have a friend to listen my unprofitable talk. Actually , I do have tapi you know. It's not good to keep bothering them with trivial things. Since they have their own life and problem to attend with.


         Hurmm..

                I AM A NURSE AND NURSE IS FAKE

              The somewhat rebellious zone back to my ward for this past few weeks , conclude me to suddenly come up with this one hell random thing. The complete Unrelated in between Those.

              The somewhat statement yang seperti diatas itu boleh menyebabkan kemarahan keatas segelintir pihak. BANYAK pihak sebenarnya. 

KENAPA ?

            Orang akan kata " KAU sebagai SEOrang JURURAWAT merendahkan MARTABAT sendiri. HOW will PEOPLE to come and RESPECT your PROFESSION ? "

Takpun

" BEtter RESIGN from BEING NURSE ! "

             Sama seperti adanya siang dan malam , ada baik dan buruk , permulaan dan penamatnya, Pasti ada yang akan SETUJU dengan pendapat ini.
 
            Dan tentu saja ada yang Marah dengan pendapat ini.

                                                                                                PAstinya, dari kalangan rakan sejawatan. 

BUT , I DO BELIEVE

WHEN we Start Thinking Stuff Like This , That means we start thinking about How am I as a NURSE . A GOOd NURSE ...A GOOd NURSE by All Meaning.

To start with , What is Nurse ? Who's Nurse ? How does it feel working as A Nurse ? How IKHLAS i am when I working as a NURSE.  

I do my work without problem . I listen the story or complain from patient , parents , relatives with smile and give advice as I see appropriate.

But ,Just when I think back my journey as a nurse , When i Start watching other nurse , When I start reading unrelated book  here and there 

I ENDED UP REALISED

Im not a good nurse neither a bad one. 

When I reached to this Conclusion , Its seriously  Hurt me. It's Bleeding Deep Inside. For this past Few years , I WONDERED on how I'd DONE my WOrk.

ANd then Feel the Urge to Find the TRUE JOYFULL for Being a Nurse

It's Nothing Much. ( I guess )

Katanya....

Assalamualaikum..

 Im coming back after awhile. It's Aayie here.

Again , nothing much to talk though. Just checking here and there and updating here and there too.

Well then.

Goodbye.. haha

Just kidding.

              Lately , Im getting exhausted while working. Uncomfort chest pain. Kinda squeezing ,heavy as if a rock has been put at my chest , poking feel , hard to breath. Indigestion feeling i guess. Can't really tell ..As far as I concern , it's always happen whenever I get busy with work. Once in awhile, the pain comes while resting.

              When I tried to google , the an article related to heart disease, and my situation kind of fitting with those condition . High risk of Heart problem.

Family history for heart cases.
I do have hypertension for now and taking Perindopril everyday. I think, my hypertension related to my hyperthyroid problem.

            Well , of course i'm under treatment and regular follow up.My next appointment almost near and this problem is  not affecting  me much.

Am I sound complaining ? Hehe

So ,

If somebody out there read this , your opinion is welcome. It's good to hear pro and contra after all..

Anything I can say , Thanks for read this.

May Allah Bless.. Ameen.

And then ,

Assalam

middle night words

The empty feeling inside 
Makes me wonders all day
All alone keeping everything bottled

Doing such a good job 
Ain't I ?
Keep myself composed outside
Just How fake am I until now ?

Wonder and Wonder
Continously wondering around
As if I living inside the white world 
Nothing inside

Looking for something
Something appreciate
Something wonderfull
Something...................

Im looking for rainbow
Even right now I feel like my tears ready to fall anytime

The insensitive me suddenly being so weak
Being nobody
Ignored the reality
As someone who doesn't deserve anything and everything
Is it me ?

In the end
The word of INFERIOR linger around
Linger and Linger
And linger

Again 
Once again 
Im just a mere HUMAN......